Johnny English

We've had films based on comic strips (Batman, Spider-Man etc.), ones based on 'classic' TV serials (Mission: Impossible, The Avengers etc.) and even ones based on trading cards (Mars Attacks!), but films based on credit card adverts are few and far between. The original adverts featured Rowan Atkinson as an outwardly smooth, but clearly bumbling secret agent and evidently with his success in the Bean movie (I never did understand the appeal of Mr Bean) and the Austin Powers franchise, Atkinson clearly felt the world was ready for a proper Bond spoof. Let me clarify (like butter); Austin Powers always struck me as more about the whole swinging sixties, the actual Bond spoofery only being an element, but Johnny English is James Bond's idiot brother. Did you know, Sean Connery's brother starred in a little seen, spoof Bond film in the 60's? Can't say I don't teach you anything, even if it's not related to film music in the slightest.

The production of the score to Johnny English is replete with quirks. For one, Robbie Williams would be my number one choice for a Bond singer in the grand tradition of Tom Jones' Thunderball, but apparently he doesn't have enough appeal in America (it's just a shame that Madonna does; help, no... go away... Die Another Day, get out of my head!), but fortunately the producers of Johnny English thought he'd be ideal. I'm glad they agree with me, even if it's only for the spoof. In fairness, A Man for All Seasons isn't really the parody Bond song one might expect, the ballsy orchestral arrangement is appropriate, but it doesn't have the Barry sound that David Arnold so lovingly recreated for his terrific - but sadly unused as the title tune - Surrender from Tomorrow Never Dies. However, it's a great song and Williams' delivery is perfect. Oh, and it's co-written with Hans Zimmer, best known for his work on the European quiz show Going for Gold, hosted by Henry Kelly (plus he won an Oscar, but nobody really remembers him for that).

I bet film's producers couldn't get over themselves when they also managed to obtain the services of the nubile string quartet, Bond; oh, the irony! Their two entries fit in extremely well with Edward Shearmur's score, particularly the swanky, self-penned Kismet. The final and perhaps most subtle quirk is that the Johnny English theme is co-penned with UK television theme tunesmith extraordinaire, Howard Goodall, who wrote the themes for Red Dwarf and Blackadder, amongst others, the latter starring Atkinson, perhaps explaining Goodall's involvement. Therefore, all the tracks where the Johnny English theme appear are credited to both Shearmur and Goodall. OK, so Monty Norman is the sole legal composer of the Bond theme, but Barry gave the melody its distinctive arrangement. The Johnny English theme is a pretty good spoof Bond tune, complete with Vic Flick (I have his business card, ain't that cool?) style guitar in the lead, although it's not quite as memorable as it wants to be, effective though it is.

I bet if Ed (can I call you Ed?) Shearmur is reading this review he's probably wondering when I'm going to get around to his contribution, well here it is. And it's great. Where David Arnold started to go off the boil with his last Bond score (trying to out-do Madonna in the badness stakes, although trailing quite considerably), Shearmur nicely parodies Arnold's mixtures of guitars, digital percussion and swaggering brass, which doesn't sound like a cheap imitation, but mixes a cheeky exuberance with enough seriousness to be completely convincing. The best moments are undoubtedly the funky action sequences, Truck Chase and Parachute Drop are particularly good with lashings of the main theme (as Enid Blyton would say). However, it would be unfair to dismiss the quieter moments as Shearmur does a nice job here too and tracks like the lovely, piano based Café Conversation are wonderful, twisting the main theme into something a little more romantic. The results are surprisingly effective and certainly more genuinely engaging than one might expect for a film of this type, carefully avoiding needless sentiment. Shearmur also gets in a bit of the exotic, most notably in the finale, Riviera Hideaway.

The final track is a full quarter of an hour, but contains a couple of minutes of rocking guitar riffs at the beginning and then many minutes of silence and a short, quiet reprise of the Johnny English theme at the end. It's even labeled at its full length, which only increases the disappointment that the final track isn't some kind of blow out finale action cue. Strange production decision there. The tracks by Moloko and ABBA don't really fit in with the overall tone and Does Your Mother Know upsets the flow of the final few score tracks, but I'll let it pass as both are good songs. What a strange review and full of even more asides (plus things in brackets) than usual, but the upshot is, Johnny English is terrific fun. Go buy it today! Edward Shearmur and Robbie Williams for Bond!